Amol
I know myself too well…I’ve never come across a lazy bum like myself in the past 25yrs. I don’t know how the hell am I going to maintain this blog funda. But I like the concept and the fact that a lot of people from the group are getting involved with it makes me give it a try.
I was trying to figure out what to write….and then I get this classy idea. I’m going to write about the friends I have. The whole idea is to maul them big time….but I know it could turn emotional by the time I’m finished with it. The way I figure I’ll do this is, I’ll write about one particular person per posting…..so hopefully that should take care of my month...hehehe.
I’d like to bring your attention to the first specimen of the crazy breed….I’m not going to take any names coz that’ll put me in trouble….so I’ll just come up with a name for this character. Let me call him Alom Kena. It’s not who u think it is…so relax.
Alom is a successful engineer working in a classy firm doing projects in (as another classy character puts it) in burkinafaso. Alom has a very busy week….he slogs his butt off on weekdays…and then finally as Friday evening arrives he chills at home. Alom likes to stay busy and when he has nothing better to do he indulges in his preferred pass-time. He likes to conjure up fictitious stories about others and just shred their lives. Alom looks forward to Friday evening coz that is when he indulges in what he does best. He thinks of it as giving others a new beginning….coz once he’s done with them, they need to start their lives all over again.
So come Friday and you’ll find Alom rocking in his easy-chair and thinking who should he maul this weekend. Choosing a victim is a very intricate process solved by process of elimination. But off late Alom has become lazy. So what he does is he takes out his collection, of the names of people whose b’day he had forgotten had it not been for me reminding him that morning. Ahem….that would include a particular “leader” and a “matrimony aunty”.
So he sits there rocking in his chair listening to “Satisfaction” by Benny Benassi and sipping on vodka. He does this for maybe half an hour…..and then he gets down to business. He randomly selects a person and the entire night he spends contemplating how he could create a maximum damaging situation. By Saturday morning he has his plan for character assassination in place. And then he starts putting it into action. He works ferociously throughout Saturday. After all he has a dead line to meet. He does not sleep Saturday night too….now that’s what I call dedication. Come Sunday and he is ready. He has his usual Sunday breakfast of green salad….yes green salad….I told you before it’s not who u think…Man!!! So anyway…it’s been a very tiring weekend and he finally decides to go to sleep. That is the reason why you’ll always get his voicemail if u try calling him late Sunday mornings. He claims he was playing cricket or basketball with his friends…yeah right!
He wakes up Sunday night, in time for dinner. Has his bhindichi bhaji…..I told u it’s not who you think… and rice and then heads straight to the computer…after all the final blow is yet to be delivered. So he logs on to his email.com address and posts a mail on his favorite yahoo group. He shuts down his machine and heads for the bed again. After all, tomorrow will be a Monday and he’ll need all the sleep he can catch to get him through the week…cause Friday is far away.
Sunday night at his place, is Monday morning in a particular south Asian country that he hails from. So the moment he sends the mail on his yahoo group, people have an instant access to his crap. The poor victim who if bad luck has it, is still in Alom’s country he/she would have no clue what’s in store for him/her when he/she checks his/her mail the next day. And if the victim happens to be in the south Asian country I mentioned earlier, still no chance of survival….it all happens so sudden that the victim can’t do anything about it.
But the coolest part is when Alom reaches his office and receives a frantic mail from the victim pleading to him to take back his words…Alom reads the mail once….he looks out of his office window…then he reads the mail one more time….he asks his secretary to get him his coffee…she informs him that, getting coffee was not a part of her job…he looks at the computer screen… vindictively sends the frantic plea message to his trashcan. Then he calmly looks at the secretary…scans her from head to toe…this makes her very uncomfortable…and then he nonchalantly tells her…NEET BOL!!!
The victim’s reputation has been thrown to the dogs…there is nothing else to do but to start a new life. Hopefully his/her name won’t come up soon in the super-friday playwin lucky draw…eventually it will…but lets hope it’s not soon.
I would like to emphasize on the fact that it is not who u think it is…. The person who u think I’m talking about, is an angel in reality. He’s a good boy who could never hurt anybody. Any resemblance to him would be purely coincidental…..and Ramesh is straight……yeah right!!!
Next in line…Mr. Back S. Tabber
I was trying to figure out what to write….and then I get this classy idea. I’m going to write about the friends I have. The whole idea is to maul them big time….but I know it could turn emotional by the time I’m finished with it. The way I figure I’ll do this is, I’ll write about one particular person per posting…..so hopefully that should take care of my month...hehehe.
I’d like to bring your attention to the first specimen of the crazy breed….I’m not going to take any names coz that’ll put me in trouble….so I’ll just come up with a name for this character. Let me call him Alom Kena. It’s not who u think it is…so relax.
Alom is a successful engineer working in a classy firm doing projects in (as another classy character puts it) in burkinafaso. Alom has a very busy week….he slogs his butt off on weekdays…and then finally as Friday evening arrives he chills at home. Alom likes to stay busy and when he has nothing better to do he indulges in his preferred pass-time. He likes to conjure up fictitious stories about others and just shred their lives. Alom looks forward to Friday evening coz that is when he indulges in what he does best. He thinks of it as giving others a new beginning….coz once he’s done with them, they need to start their lives all over again.
So come Friday and you’ll find Alom rocking in his easy-chair and thinking who should he maul this weekend. Choosing a victim is a very intricate process solved by process of elimination. But off late Alom has become lazy. So what he does is he takes out his collection, of the names of people whose b’day he had forgotten had it not been for me reminding him that morning. Ahem….that would include a particular “leader” and a “matrimony aunty”.
So he sits there rocking in his chair listening to “Satisfaction” by Benny Benassi and sipping on vodka. He does this for maybe half an hour…..and then he gets down to business. He randomly selects a person and the entire night he spends contemplating how he could create a maximum damaging situation. By Saturday morning he has his plan for character assassination in place. And then he starts putting it into action. He works ferociously throughout Saturday. After all he has a dead line to meet. He does not sleep Saturday night too….now that’s what I call dedication. Come Sunday and he is ready. He has his usual Sunday breakfast of green salad….yes green salad….I told you before it’s not who u think…Man!!! So anyway…it’s been a very tiring weekend and he finally decides to go to sleep. That is the reason why you’ll always get his voicemail if u try calling him late Sunday mornings. He claims he was playing cricket or basketball with his friends…yeah right!
He wakes up Sunday night, in time for dinner. Has his bhindichi bhaji…..I told u it’s not who you think… and rice and then heads straight to the computer…after all the final blow is yet to be delivered. So he logs on to his email.com address and posts a mail on his favorite yahoo group. He shuts down his machine and heads for the bed again. After all, tomorrow will be a Monday and he’ll need all the sleep he can catch to get him through the week…cause Friday is far away.
Sunday night at his place, is Monday morning in a particular south Asian country that he hails from. So the moment he sends the mail on his yahoo group, people have an instant access to his crap. The poor victim who if bad luck has it, is still in Alom’s country he/she would have no clue what’s in store for him/her when he/she checks his/her mail the next day. And if the victim happens to be in the south Asian country I mentioned earlier, still no chance of survival….it all happens so sudden that the victim can’t do anything about it.
But the coolest part is when Alom reaches his office and receives a frantic mail from the victim pleading to him to take back his words…Alom reads the mail once….he looks out of his office window…then he reads the mail one more time….he asks his secretary to get him his coffee…she informs him that, getting coffee was not a part of her job…he looks at the computer screen… vindictively sends the frantic plea message to his trashcan. Then he calmly looks at the secretary…scans her from head to toe…this makes her very uncomfortable…and then he nonchalantly tells her…NEET BOL!!!
The victim’s reputation has been thrown to the dogs…there is nothing else to do but to start a new life. Hopefully his/her name won’t come up soon in the super-friday playwin lucky draw…eventually it will…but lets hope it’s not soon.
I would like to emphasize on the fact that it is not who u think it is…. The person who u think I’m talking about, is an angel in reality. He’s a good boy who could never hurt anybody. Any resemblance to him would be purely coincidental…..and Ramesh is straight……yeah right!!!
Next in line…Mr. Back S. Tabber
posted by Pratap at 7:53 PM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home